It seems to be fairly common that we hear how our relationships begin to change after “the honeymoon is over.” I am one who feels this isn’t factually based and an exaggeration. Yet if we aren’t careful, over time our fondness for each other may dwindle if we aren’t aware of what attracted us originally.
Our happiness with one another relies on some principles that could have been magnified while courting, and dismissed as we fell back into individual patterns. Here are some suggestions of what we can do to keep the fire of happiness burning in our marriages.
We are all unique. It is because of our individual traits we became attracted to each other in the first place. Over time, and as we begin to learn more about each other, we witness variety in what interests us. It is imperative that these interests maintain a common theme. When you take the time to see why your partner is intrigued, you will be too. Cultivating common interests will insure each of your needs are taken care of.
Each of us enjoys being forgiven when we have done something wrong (or stupid). Carry a spirit of forgiveness toward your partner. It is through falling down we learn to get up. Help your partner up when the time arises so that when you fall someone is there to lift you.
When we trust, the natural default is that we are trusted. Marriages are teamwork, what we do influences our partner. Nothing will be of greater comfort than to know your partners first impulse is to trust what you are doing.
We are human, which means we will make mistakes. If the mishaps of life are where we place our attention; the glass of our relationship may seem half empty. Conversely, if we take that same energy and focus on the good our partners do, these traits will fill our glass such that our lives will overflow with joy.
Little things matter today as they always have. Retire from your day together, hold hands as often as possible, hug when the setting allows, and lay next to each other in bed. Say I love you both morning and night (all the time is good too). Check on each other throughout the day. Make sure your primary interest is learning of your partner’s day.
Lastly, and perhaps most important, let your partner know how proud you are of them! Our canine friends show us how happy we make them feel naturally as they wag their tail. Beam with pride as you talk about or are with your best friend. As you do this, they will sense your pride and reciprocate. Know in your heart that your union makes you greater than the sum of your parts…